SubDrop tells the story of a middle-aged bipolar man in the midst of a spectacular crack-up. After years of living on meds and trying to be “a good patient,” the main character finds his career at a standstill, his relationship falling apart, and debts mounting through a gambling addiction, a cocaine problem and alcoholism. Checking himself into a psychiatric hospital after using his blog to commit career suicide by publishing a detailed account of a rival’s own sexual habits and drug use, he emerges only to find himself stumbling into a BDSM community seeking to find himself. A strange world with strange habits all its own, he finds in BDSM that he is unwilling to commit himself to either the humiliation of being of a proper submissive and that he also lacks the sadism necessary to be a proper dominant, and flees to the desert to commit suicide, only to be saved by a friend’s insistence that he write a proper letter explaining all the reasons why he feels he needs to end it all. Writing it all down as fast as he can to keep him from falling apart completely, the main character is contacted by his real father, who has heard of his problems and wants to come see him after ten years of total estrangement. Their meeting is bittersweet, as the son realizes that he simply will never be the man his father became and that he’s destined to live forever on the margins of society. The only place he feels he’s ever really belonged is Burning Man, and he heads there to find an antidote to the dissolution of his real-life community. Through the random factors of the Burning Man experience, he inadvertently finds himself in a shamanic healing tent, where a healer performs psychic surgery on him to remove a “snake of self-hatred” that lives buried beneath the chakra in his solar plexus, leaving him feeling renewed and refreshed and willing to move forward, knowing that despite his many issues both real and imagined, his real father really does love him, no matter what.
SubDrop is a fast, quick, and in-your-face look at a variety of issues that are lurking just beneath the surface of mainstream consciousness, including edge sexuality, mental illness, addiction, the Horatio Alger and American Dream story embodied by the father’s success and the marginality of the creative class that the son has tried so desperately to be a part of, but whose own resources are drying up in the midst of the impending economic collapse of the United States and the world at large. It is a bold and introspective tale filled with characters who are struggling with notions of power and powerlessness in an effort to reach a mythical place called “SubSpace” where notions of personal identity are released completely to someone else and one’s consciousness is allowed to ride on a cushion of chemical and psychologically induced highs that inevitably bring forth a come-down place called “SubDrop,” which the BDSM participant crashes into once the realization that there is really nowhere to hide in the chaos of our current cultural condition. Plagued with both bipolar disorder and a myriad of real-life problems, the main character rides a fast-paced rollercoaster ride of personal empowerment and dissolution in both the bedroom and in real life.
Coming soon to Amazon Kindle.